Ideas v. people

Do we love the Church or do we merely love the idea of the Church?

What happens when our concept of someone, our expectations, our projection of who they are does not match up with reality?  What happens when we fail to live up to each other's expectations?  I will surely fail you all at some point; I probably already have.  And the Church will do the same.

Do we believe in the Church, or just the idea of Church?

I have to ask myself this question a lot.  In part this is because my job as a campus pastor requires me to.  As a leader I am helping guide a community of faith (in my case college students), and to effectively lead I must have an understanding of what this community is called to do and be.  I have heard it said (cannot remember the source) a pastor must lead two churches, the church existing now, and the church this community is becoming.  But the gap between these two churches can be frustrating.

So do I love college students, or do I merely love the idea of college students?

But this question about loving the Church is not just for vocational ministers, but for everyone in the Body of Christ.  We all need to be asking ourselves this; to be a follower of Jesus means to be a part of the Church.

The idea of Church is neat and exciting; it is balanced, void of ego, and clean.

The reality of Church is exciting and messy, full of broken people and crying babies.  We often think the chaos of life gets in the way of our faith, when in fact our faith is truly lived in the midst of, not despite, the messiness and unpredictability of life.  If your problem with Church has to do with people no denomiation, para-church organization, or worship model will be able to solve your issue.  We are not called to merely love and serve those who are easy to love and serve.

I have known people who love the concept of Church; who love to theorize about the fullness of Church and contemplate all which the Church is called to be.  But I have also known people so fixated on these ideas and ideals that no real church has ever been enough, and they have not participated in a community of faith.

Church is more challenging in practice than in theory.  You have to get your hands dirty to be a part of it.  We have to engage with others in the fullness of our humanity, weakness, and sin.  I have begun to see all those inconveniences which have bothered me, which were so disruptive to the sanctity of the moment, are in fact the reality of Church.  Church is not a perfect worship service.  Church is not a deeply contemplative moment.  Church is living our lives and our faith together with others; where we are free to be open and honest, even if we disturb each other's peace at times.  We love the idea of individual faith.  Autonomy is so appealing.  But we have not been created or called to walk this out alone.  We need each other.  I need you.  And life lived with others is so much better.

It is hard to love the Church at times.  I can get discouraged by students' lack of maturity or commitment.  Because I am called to help encourage and support students in becoming who God has created them to be, I can get frustrated when students do not live up to their calling.

In spite of all this, our call is not to the idea of Church, but to the practice of Church.  Faith lived out in community.

Do You Bail Water or Abandon Ship?

I believe in the Church.  It may be increasingly popular not to.  There is a lot of criticism and cynicism revolving around the Church.

Such feelings are understandable.  Many people have been burned by the Church whether through legalism, hypocrisy, or abuse of authority.  And I cannot blame anyone for these feelings.

There also seems to be a growing conviction our faith is something personal and solitary.  Why would I need others to be involve in my private spirituality?  While I agree about the importance of individual faith and personal salvation, I do not believe it negates the very real need for others.  Our faith is not our own at the expense of involving community.

Past wounds coupled with an over-emphasis on the individuality of faith can produce a very anti-Church sentiment.

Given the fallen state of things and the brokenness of the Church we have to ask ourselves if we will bail water or abandon ship?  With the reality of our situation what will we do?  Do we fight on?  Do we jump ship?  Will we work to help build the Church into who God has designed us to be or will we give up?

It is important we ask ourselves our expectations of the Church.  Why does it surprise us when the Church acts like a bunch of broken people?  We are all in progress.  I am a hypocrite, not for lack of effort, but because the goal set before me and my current level of sanctification are not equal.  I have to be honest about my short-comings, while keeping my eyes upon Jesus.  The Church is not a place for perfect people, there are none.  The Church is a home for the sick and hurting.  Can we give the Church enough grace to be the Church?

Life is not a solitary experience.  Our faith, while personal, has never been intended to be lived alone.  In fact isolation was the first "not good" thing in all of Creation, "it is not good for man to be alone" (Gen 2:18).  Too much of scripture testifies to our corporate design.  Heb 10:24-25 exhorts meeting together and encouraging each other to grow in our faith.  1 Cor 12:12-27 and Rom 12:4-8 both describe how we as a body are to function together.

We in the Church need each other.  I am not autonomous; I cannot do this on my own.  Often we have this "American dream" view of faith which is not Biblical and is not real.  Life is full of hurt and challenges, and we need each other to stand firm.  I have seen too many friends walk away from their faith not because of Theological problems, not because of inconsistency, not because of imperfections, but because of a lack of community.

Something greater happens when we come together; in community there is power beyond the sum of each of us.  Corporate worship is not just about meeting at a regular time or socializing after service, but is about the Body of Christ coming together to grow and uplift and re-calibrate ourselves to be better equipped for going out into this dark and broken world.

Ultimately I believe in the Church because Jesus believes in the Church.  He has wept, bled, and died for the Church.  Jesus would not have come to earth, been rejected by people He loves, and died painfully on the cross if He did not believe we were worth it.  Similarly He would not have left His ministry of reconciliation (2 Cor 5:18-20) to us if He did not believe in the Church.  

Grace is not a one shot opportunity; Jesus did not give us just one second-chance but instead opened the door for us to come home.  I may want to limit how much I forgive the Church, but Jesus in His infinite forgiveness of my sins has not called me to be limited in forgiveness.

Instead may we also sacrifice for the bride whom Christ has declared to be worth it.

The Myth of Utopia and Why I Don't Live There (yet)

This world is a broken place, there is not much use in denying it.  I am broken.  And I am honestly more broken than I realize (or want to admit).

But what do we do in the face of such brokenness?  How do we respond?  What options do we have?

One option is the idea of utopia.  The world is broken?  We can fix that.  Look at all that humanity has overcome.  Society, technology, medicine.  We killed Smallpox!  We have built cities, written constitutions, formed elaborate systems of civilization.  Life expectancy, quality of life, so many mountains we have scaled.    This world is ours to steward, and we will subdue it (Gen 1:28-29), this is our Manifest Destiny.  What holds us back from achieving this dream?

Us

me

Because despite all our accomplishments, we cannot save us from ourselves.  The factor in any hypothetical situation which leads to the inevitable downfall of a utopia is always the human element.  The laws of Physics, Bio-chemistry, etc. can be mastered and manipulated, but in any scenario humanity always finds a way to be its undoing.  Left to my own devices I am as selfish as ever.

Yet we still try to be our own salvation.  Legalism thrives on the belief I can fix myself.  Religion encourages it.  The idols of human logic and Secular Humanism worship it too.  At times I find this idea alluring.  But utopia is a myth.  And I would not fit in.

But what shall we do in the face of such brokenness?  If we cannot fix ourselves what hope is there?  Many understandably give up.  What else can we do?  Sure we can try, but either we deceive ourselves or we will eventually grow too weary from trying.

And here we find the critical junction.  What do you do then? Everything hangs upon what we do next.  We can collapse into depression and eventual destruction.  Or we can call out to Him who can save us from us.

I have found that many of my most broken moments are my most peaceful moments.   Brokenness leads to dependency, which leads to intimacy, and intimacy brings "a peace which surpasses all understanding" (Phil 4:7).  My hope for salvation and utopia is not in myself.  It is God alone who is redeeming and reconciling the world back to Himself.  And in His infinite goodness He lets us join the fun.  So we cannot save ourselves, but we can partner with Him who can (2 Cor 5:18-20).

a lesson in herbs: Leaves and Fruit (inspired by Tad)

Over a year ago I started an herb garden in our apartment.  I chose herbs because they are edible.  This is my chili pepper plant.  As you may notice it has a lot of leaves and only one little white flower.  I will probably not harvest a lot off this pepper plant.

I recently had the privilege to eat lunch with my friend Tad.  In the course of hanging out we discussed the fact as Americans we focus a lot upon goals and achievements.  We often determine an endeavor successful based upon the yield.  This crosses over into ministry as well.  How many people came to our event, do we have more small groups than last year, are we building moment etc.  And this is okay, fruit is a good thing.  Jesus Himself talks about "the harvest".

As Tad pointed out the problem comes when we only look at the fruit.  Yes, success is exciting, new people is encouraging, but we forget a plant only bears fruit in a season.  The rest of the year the plant is absorbing light, water (both, as Tad mentioned, have huge metaphorical values) etc.  We look at the fruit only, and forget the rest of the plant which sustains the fruit.  This is why Jesus tells us to abide (John 15:5).  But even here the danger is we will see abiding as a formula for success.

Our desire to bear fruit should stem from seeking to obediently follow God.  And our desire for obedience should stem from a submission and surrender to God.  His love and His worthiness should be what inspires our obedience.  When I was in sin over my head my God died for me and justified me by His blood (Romans 5:8-11).  He rose to new life, victorious over sin and death, and has called me to follow Him.  Because God loves me, I desire to obey Him.  But our culture of success and achievement believes instead because I obey God, God should love me.  An obsession with fruit is dangerous because it can warp our understanding of grace by faith.

Instead of earning our merit, earning our fruit, we need to abide in Him.  He is our source and our success.  Once we are rooted in Christ next we need to take steps of preparation.  We need to put out leaves of prayer, organization, community, etc.  Planning and preparation are needed for long term growth.  An ardent but impatient attitude will yield unripe fruit.  Just as the plant requires leaves and roots before producing anything, we have to build ourselves and our ministries with the proper infrastructure to do so too.  We have to understand it will not be the successes, but persistence, which carries us through the long seasons between harvests.  Seasons of reaping, seasons of planting, tending, etc. are all a part of the rhythms of our temporal existence.  We cannot skip steps and simply go from harvest to harvest; to do so we will only be sowing burn-out.  Sabbaths, rhythms, and structures are necessary for longevity.  

Let us not despise the season of preparation between harvests and let us not neglect our leaves.  Let us abide in Christ, that we may bear good fruit.

Idols and Free Radicals

I hate to break it to you, but oxygen is a poison.  Yes, the O2 gas you are breathing and I am breathing is extremely toxic.  This is where we get free radicals which need to be combated with antioxidants.  Yes, oxygen left to its own devices is a killer.  Every cell in your body is constantly fighting against the threat of oxygen (called oxidative stress).  So why do we breathe it and die without it?  Our bodies have learned to harness the same chemical properties which make it so reactive to drive our cellular metabolism.  But this comes at a great cost.  Common free radicals like O2- (superoxide) can bind to proteins and DNA, causing cell death or triggering cancer.  

Exciting right?  This simple element you cannot live without may one day kill you.  Why bring this up?  Because free radicals are a good illustration of our idolatrous hearts.

We were created good and whole, meant to worship God alone, but the ionizing radiation of the Fall has left us broken and reactive.  We are now predisposed to idol making and everyone is worshiping something.  Like the free radicals which destroy whatever they bind to, we continue reaching for the next unsatisfying idol trying to fill this broken bond.  Under the pressure of idolization we corrupt whatever our idol is.  Many of our worst idols were previously good things before we warped them with our fallenness.  Ministry for example can become a terrible terrible idol if I allow my heart to twist it into such.  Similarly relationships, accomplishments, or acceptance can become horrible idols.  Now I must wrestle with my old-self to keep Jesus on the throne and not my idols.  I need my ionization discharged.

Our only hope is in Jesus, who is able to heal us and satisfy the unpaired electrons in our souls.  Only a covalent bond with Him can put my radical nature to rest and make me whole and holy again.