Thomas

One of my favorite Gospel stories has to be the story of Thomas in John 20:24-29. Throughout church history people have given "Doubting Thomas" flack for his doubt. We look down upon him and his weak faith, knowing that our faith is somehow superior. "Silly Thomas, ye of little faith!"

But if I'm honest I doubt my faith at times. I had to deal with some doubts last week even. Maybe my faith isn't so superior to Thomas'?

Maybe it's okay to doubt?

I honestly believe that doubt is an essential part of faith. In my life I have seen that it's important for any true relationship I'm in; that the occasional doubt is a healthy sign. Because a "faith" that I cannot question is a "faith" that I am slave to. It is also a "faith" that I alone sustain.

But if I honestly believe Hebrews 12:2 then not I, but Jesus, is the "author and perfector" of my faith. Or do I believe that I'm in control?

What I love about the story of Thomas' doubts is that Thomas is honest. He's not being immature, he is being real enough to say "this is where I'm at, this is what I'm feeling, and this is my line in the sand."

And how does Jesus respond to Thomas?

Does Jesus cry "Begone! I never knew you!"?

No

Jesus appears a week later to the eleven. And he goes to Thomas and says

"Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe." (v 27)

Jesus does not require Thomas to prove himself, say the "right" words, perform correctly.

Jesus meets Thomas where he is at, in his doubt. Jesus does not rebuke him in his doubt, but helps Thomas work through his doubt. Of course Jesus does not want us to be stranded, but He is okay with using doubt as an avenue to a deeper understanding of who He is.

Likewise Jesus does not require us to prove our faith. If we will be honest with ourselves and our doubt, Jesus will meets us where we are. I think God is a lot less interested in proving His existence and a lot more interested in relationship with us than we think.

"I'm like Thomas doubting,

fingers routing the scars

in your wrists and side.

Touching flesh will make my mind believe"

"Dizzy" by Sixpence None the Richer